When I think back to 2020, for us, it was an easier year than 2021 ... and that's hard to believe.
There is one connection in life that truly matters; it's love. We take it with us.
My Mother Passed Away - If You Suffered Loss, My Heart is With You
My brothers and I shared the day and evening with my mother as she left in late November. It was the most beautiful and terrifying experience of my life. I compare it to birth for those very emotions.
As a little girl, I remember feeling so scared that my mother would die. I would ask to sleep with her when my dad traveled for work. When I was eight years old, I finally told her why - "I'm scared you're going to die, Mom."
As a grown woman with kids and grandkids, I somehow graduated out of that fear of losing my mom. I'm confused about how that happened - how did I lose that fear? I'm grateful for losing it but I am genuinely baffled by how I grew out of it. Since mom passed, I have had this strange feeling that she's with me (inside me), and I think that's the reason? It's weird.
On the night she passed, I broke down like an infant. They were the sobs I needed, and my brothers and my sister-in-law were there to hold me through it. We each had our moments, and the beautiful side is that my parents raised a family that got along and stood by each other. We're fortunate.
My Wish for Humanity - That 2022 Goes Easy on Us
We've all been challenged in unforeseen ways, some more than others. Despite the difficulties we've faced, including the loss of my mom, I'm the first to admit how fortunate my family is to have a roof over our heads, running water, plumbing, and electricity! There's so much unfairness and financial inequity in the world that those of us who live in a functioning society need to remember how blessed we are.
My hopes and dreams for all of us are inner peace, love, prosperity, and good health. May 2022 bring you balance in body, mind, and spirit.
Here's a song that beautifully honors all moms; this lyric resonates with me, "there's no safer place I've found than the shoulder on her white nightgown."
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. xoxo
"A mother is with us always, first in her lifetime, then forever in our memory.” Your mother will never be any farther away then your favorite memories of her, Barbara. This is a lovely tribute to her, along with the special bond you have with your brothers. Thank you for sharing. Your words and sentiment are helpful to all who have experienced similar losses. May the New Year be one of love and the lifetime balance you always seek.
ReplyDeleteHugs, Elf
Thanks Elf <3
DeleteBarbara dear, you have been in my thoughts and my heart even more often than usual during the past few months, especially since your beloved mom’s passing. From everything I know about your parents, there is no doubt in my mind that they live on in you, in your courage, kindness, honesty, empathy, strength, determination and unconditional love. I echo your wishes for a kinder, gentler 2022 for all people and other living creatures and things.
ReplyDeleteMargaret, I'm so grateful for your friendship; you're a wonderful soul who truly 'sees' people, including me. That is one of your great gifts. Thank you for keeping us in your thoughts - as you know 2021 was beyond challenging. I'm with you - let 2022 be a kinder, gentler year; we all need it. <3
DeleteMy Mom has been gone 7 years and I still miss her always, but I think at Christmas I especially miss her. She was the thread the bound our family together and although we are still close..it just isn't the same. Mom particularly loved Christmas. Her and Dad ran a choose and cut Christmas Tree farm and Christmas was always a busy and special time for them. God be with you Barbara during this challenging time.
ReplyDeleteMary Beth, I'm sorry for your loss as well - your parents and family sound amazing - the idea of their Christmas Farm is beautiful - so nice. Hugs to you.
DeleteDear Barbara, life is soft, and hard, and sweet and bittersweet too! What's important is that your family is holding together during all this upset! When we can hold onto those near and dear to us, missing the one becomes a little easier and yes, we are all going to be together again one day! I know you believe in a spiritual side, and that is where she is now. One day we will be there with her again. May you be blessed with peace in 2022!
ReplyDeleteI believe the same thing as well, thank you so much for the soothing words
Delete♥♥♥ to you, beautiful song of remembrance.
ReplyDeletethank you Savvy - I do love the lyrics to that song :)
DeleteI truly believe everyone is born with a purpose and a mission in this life, Barbara. So often, the "mission" of being a mother is undervalued because there is no monetary income associated with it. However, having a wonderful mother is a priceless gift and the mission of being a mother far exceeds any dollar amount. It is very clear by the things you have shared about your mom that your mother embraced her true mission and fulfilled it to the fullest. There are no words sufficient to help heal the pain, but I am truly sorry and you have my deepest felt condolences. May the Comforter hold and strengthen you in the months, even years, to come.
ReplyDeleteSylvestermouse, thank you <3 - I'm finding this stage of my life "strange" - I've yet to put it into words what I'm feeling - of course, sadness and I miss her so much I can't express it - but beyond that, there's something else - I just can't put my finger on what it is?? You are so right about Mom's, especially terrific moms like my own; we were all so fortunate
DeleteMy thoughts and love have been with you especially since your Mum's illness and passing. I am very sorry and words never seem to convey the real emotion at times like these. It is a challenging time and you cannot rush. Be kind and gentle with yourself. We have lost all of our parents and I miss them all still years on. We lost 3 parents within 4 years when I was in my early 30's and then my Mum much later a few years ago.You said you have this strange feeling that she's with you "(inside me)".That is familiar to me. I think I had to learn how to weave the fabric of their loss into my life and now I know I carry them within me always. Your Mum sounded a lovely woman and your family sound lovely and supportive which is a real gift. Your Mum lives on in you and she would be so proud of the wonderful caring, compassionate person you are. I wish you all a peaceful,healthy Happy New year filled with love.
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